Wednesday, January 02, 2008

ALEX RODRIGUEZ AWARD FOR BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT/CHOKE

This Award is one of the more vague ones. It can be given to an individual, a team, an executive, a group of players, anyone really. I named it after A-Rod because we all know he’s a choker.

Here are the nominations:

Alex Rodriguez - 3B, New York Yankees
Derek Jeter - SS, New York Yankees
New York Yankees
New York Jets
Boston College Football
Roger Clemens - SP, New York Yankees
Daisuke Matsuzaka - SP, Boston Red Sox

This is a tough one to decide. A-Rod had a mediocre playoff series. Jeter flat out stank in the ALDS. The Yankees came in second place and once again exited early. The Jets went from a playoff team to a pack of scurvy rats. BC Football went from being #2 in the country to playing in the Champs Sports Bowl. Roger Clemens was exposed as a phony. And Daisuke didn’t really live up to the hype in ‘07.

And the winner is…

Roger Clemens of the New York Yankees.



We all knew Clemens was a jerk, a liar, and a traitor. But as much as we hated him, we had to begrudgingly respect his outstanding pitching over the years. Until the Mitchell Report came out. Now his numbers are tainted, his artificially extended career tarnished. Those extra Cy Youngs he won in Toronto, New York, and Houston have been sullied. Roger, we’re all very disappointed in you.

DAN SHAUGNESSY AWARD FOR WORST SPORTS WRITER

This Award is pretty self explanatory. It goes to the worst sports writer.

Here are the nominees:

Dan Shaughnessey - Boston Globe
Gregg Easterbrook - ESPN.com
Jay Mariotti - Chicago Sun Times

And the winner is…

Gregg Easterbrook of ESPN.com!

I thought Shaughnessey was going to win his second Worst Sports Writer Award, but Easterbrook’s nonsensical rantings about Bill Belichick being Richard Nixon, Peyton Manning being Jesus, Tony Dungy being Mother Theresa and Tom Brady being Josef Stalin won him this award.

He was already a contender thanks to his 50,000 word columns which often feature random segments on astronomy, and tangents about large shipping vessels. He’s one of those guys that blows the importance of sports into unreal proportions, assigning “good guy” and “bad guy” tags to athletes and teams based on some sort of super high morality.

Oh, and that second G in his first name just pisses me off. It's so pretentious, just like Easterbrook.

HARRY FRAZEE AWARD FOR GOAT OF THE YEAR

This Award goes to the New England athlete who took the most criticism, guff, and abuse from the fan base, the media, and possibly his teammates. With all that was good this year in Boston, there was a definite shortage of goats.

The nominees are:
Jeremy Jacobs - owner, Boston Bruins
J.D. Drew - RF, Boston Red Sox

And the winner is…

J.D. Drew of the Boston Red Sox!



When Drew signed a $70M deal in the off-season, the fans and media of Boston were baffled. His numbers have never been eye popping, and he’s found his way to the DL more than a cop finds his way to Dunkin Donuts. Drew’s performance merited criticism, as he seemed to be pressing at times. Although he may have redeemed himself in the World Series with some big hits, people will never forget the countless times he struck out looking in game changing situations.

Drew has lots of room for improvement in 2008. With Lowell another year older, Ortiz coming off surgery, and Manny in the last year of his contract; a solid bat in the middle of the order is desperately needed. That's what JD was brought here to do. But so far, he's failed.